Tired. Right now that describes me.  I should be sleeping not typing, but I wanted to write this while I could post it.  Tonight I will sleep in a hotel, a nice comfy bed with real pillows, and no monitors beeping and going off in the night to keep me up.  Monitors, yes monitors.  Since Monday night, today is Thursday, I have slept in a hospital room with monitors going off, nurses interrupting my sleep, and the sounds of carts in the hallway early in the morning.

This time however all of that noise, and those monitors, were not the result of a hospital stay on my part.  This time it is my son.  He is staying in the hospital to have long term EEG monitoring done to determine why he is having shuttering and drop attacks.  We want to determine if this is due to epileptic activity or some other issue.  He was originally scheduled to get out today, but since he has not had a drop attack yet they wanted him to stay longer in order to attempt to capture one on monitoring.  The last 2 nights they have tried to sleep deprive my son, keeping him up till midnight and waking him at 6 am.  This means I did nearly the same, making me sleep deprived, almost seemed I was more sleep deprived then my son.  This is not so good for an epileptic who is not controlled (my story-Rocky Road).  So tonight my husband came back to town, we live 2 hours from the hospital, so that I could sleep in this nice comfy hotel.  Tired, I am very tired.  You see I know all about those hospital monitors, nurses interrupting your sleep, and carts in the hall early in the morning from my hospital stays.

Despite all of this we know one something in our family–God is God unchanging, and He is with us regardless.  So we will stand on that truth.  I may be tired, but God will never be.

We are all pulling out the trees, putting up the lights, hanging the stockings, and decorating the mantels.  It is officially the Christmas season.  As we drive down street at night more and more homes are adorned with lights.  Have you put yours up yet?  Has your tree made its appearance, filling your living room with color?  Are there any other decorations you put up during the holidays that you just love?

This year I am in my new house.  I put my Christmas village up in it’s brand new location, and I went and bought some brand new decorations for the living room.  The tree is out of storage and waiting to be put up.  All of the snowmen have been taken out of their crates and places around the house where they will stay for winter until the birdhouses reappear.  It definitely looks like Christmas in my home.

Looks–how many of us concentrate really hard on whether our homes look like Christmas?  Here is another more interesting question–does your home look like Christmas to God?  Good question, but what does Christmas look like to God?  To answer that question we must look at what Christmas is.  Christmas is a celebration of the very fact that Christ chose, of His own accord, to become flesh in order to die so that we might know forgiveness of sin.  Yes, that is what Christmas is about.  Christ’s choice to become flesh for us, and the celebration of that.  So, in order for Christmas to look like Christmas to God, He needs to see that celebration in us.  There is only way way that is going to happen, and that is if we know Christ.

So how does God see Christmas in us and in our home?  Through the very fact that we belong to Him, that we are saved by grace because He chose to come as flesh and die for us.  The celebration of Christmas is about that, and the rest of it, all the decorations, the tree, the lights, it’s all fringe.  All the fringe isn’t what pleases God at Christmas.  Sure it is pretty, but the beauty of Christmas is what God sees in us, and that is Christ who lives in us once we believe that He came to earth, died on the cross, and rose for us.  This Christmas enjoy the fringe, but celebrate what God sees in you.

The debate is starting up again, this time over New Moon.  On November 21st on Natalie Grant  posted a video on her website about going to see the movie, and the debate went from there.  After reading the responses for several days I posted what follows.  I decided to post it here, because I wanted to share it with everyone.

My whole thought on this is: if you even for one moment question your own wisdom and motive in seeing this movie–you ought to listen. The Lord gave you a helper, the Holy Spirit, to guide you. That Spirit is going to guide you to do things, say things, see things, walk places, and act in a way that is pleasing to the Father. Yes what we see, what we hear, what we say, how we act, and where we go all influence whether or not the Lord is pleased with us. Regardless of how others view us, isn’t how the Lord views us even more important to us? It should be. Why do we bother to ask what others would think of us doing something–we ought to ask what the Lord would think. If the Holy Spirit is prompting you in any way not to do something–by all means listen! Whether it is this movie, another, going somewhere, saying something, an activity you take part in, everything we do.

We are a people who have gotten so good at justifying our actions by saying “it isn’t as bad as….” or “the world is bad we shouldn’t shelter ourselves from it” or “it doesn’t influence me because I am better then that.” The bible disagrees with all of those statements. Justification for doing something that is not pleasing to the Lord–no matter what body part you do it with–is still justifying sin. If it displeases the Lord it displeases Him fully-not in part. Listen to Helper the Lord has given you, don’t drown Him out with justifications and falsehoods told to you by an enemy wishing to trip you up.

Living in a rural town we are not availed of having home delivery of our mail, no one in our town is, everyone has to go to the post office and get their mail.  One of things my husband does when he drops our son off at school in the morning is get the mail.  Usually the mail does not make it home until he arrives home in the evening.  On Fridays however his schedule varies and he does not go into until later, so he brings the mail home.  Worked out well for me today!

I woke up this morning just a few minutes before my husband was leaving for work.  He pointed out to me that I had received mail.  What did I receive?  If you read my blog regularly you have heard the names Lisa and Shellie before.  Well these same two woman, having found out it was my birthday, sent me cards!  What a delight!  Both of them also included the most encouraging words within them.

Two woman who I have never met in person were able to encourage me just where I am.  Why is that?  Because each believer is given the Holy Spirit, and the Lord bonds all believers together through the Holy Spirit.  The fellowship we share is not hampered by things in the physical world, it is a connection put there by the Lord.  So despite the fact that we have never met, our fellowship is sweet because the Lord has created the connection.  That connection will then continue when this physical world passes away and we are together with the Lord!

So thank you Lisa and Shellie, and all my other friends I have not yet met, for the fellowship we share, and the constant encouragement that is to me.  I thank the Lord that we have been brought together in such a unique way.  I look forward to the day we all meet, even if it is not here on earth, I know we all one day meet.

2 days ago I celebrated my birthday.  The night before and day of my husband and I had a lot of laughs over what could not “count” as a gift.  There were a couple of other people involved in this, Lisa and Shellie, and this made it all the more fun!

The reason this all started was because we recently moved into our new home, and as such we have ended up buying several new things for it.  My birthday turned out to be a Tuesday, the day of my woman’s bible study in Tooele, and the day we have been going into Salt Lake early to do our “house shopping”.  So we started talking about the things we needed to get and how since it was my birthday it was so convenient that they could be my gifts!  Of course the first item on the list was an appliance, I said “no that doesn’t count” and Mike just laughed–this became a running joke that extended to our twitter friends, and even included things like ice cube trays (which were much needed).  All day on my birthday we kept twittering things like”Do blinds count?” and got responses like “no blinds don’t count”.  Seems ridiculous now, but at the time it was hilarious!

Now back to those ice cube trays.  In the end Mike treated me to a very nice day, including dinner at a restaurant we don’t often go to.  I got to pick up my long awaited Casting Crowns CD and buy the Jeremy Camp Live CD, both are excellent!  I even pre bought the Toby Mac CD coming out in February.  So all in all a good day for music lovers like me.  Those ice cube trays even got remembered, and laughed about a lot.  They became the most consistent running joke of the day, the smallest most inexpensive item we bought that day, gave us the most laughs.  It was just fun.

Every time I get ice out of the freezer I am going to remember all the laughter we had on that day, not because I got those ice cube trays for my birthday (that doesn’t count) but because of the fun we all had together.  Thanks for laughing with us, and for putting up with our silly brand of humor.  It is so good to be able to laugh with others in the body of Christ and to share with them when we have Joy.

One Night my arms just decided to stop working, they stayed that way for one full week.  Both of my arms stop working in one evening within hours of each other for no apparent reason, for no known medical reason.  For me this was hard to accept, but one thing I did know, this was going to make life very difficult.

That week came with many challenges.  No one has any idea what they use their arms and hands for until they do not have the use of them.  Not being able to use one of them was one thing, but both!  I could not eat, brush my teeth, take my medications, scratch my ear, take a shower, use the bathroom, brush my hair, get dressed, nothing.  Anything you would use your arm or a finger for, I could not do.  My husband, once again, became my caregiver.  He took the week off of work and became my constant companion and caregiver, even more so then that, he became my arms.  The one thing that was rather difficult was my hair, that was the one issue that caused the most, and really only, argument.  If you ever think you might break an arm and you have no daughters, have your husband practice doing your hair now.

The Drs suggestion was wait for an inpatient bed, yet none was available.  My solution, tell as many people as I knew that would pray.  That I did, and that they did.  The Lord delights in answering the prayers of His people.  Job 5:9-9 says ” But if it were I, I would appeal to God; I would lay my cause before him. He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted.” (Job 5:8-9 NIV)  I know this-my arms did not work, people prayed, my arms now work again.  God works wonders.

It is nearing the move! We are 12 days from the closing date on our new home, and 17 days from the move in date!  As we look ahead to when we move my husband Mike and I find ourselves saying “that is something I won’t miss”.  When we say that we are always referring to those things where we live now that have always annoyed us, but that we have learned to live with yet not complain about.  Funny thing is now that we are moving we are noticing them again and allowing ourselves to say “that is something I won’t miss.”

Though that is not much of a complaint, it is a way of telling each other that though we haven’t complained about it all this time, it has annoyed us.  As I thought about these things, I started to wonder what would happen when we moved and we started to find those little things in our new house that annoy us yet we don’t complain about.  Yes of course we will love our new home, yet there are always those little things you find that you wish were just a little different.  Maybe it will be a light switch that isn’t in quite the right spot, or how far the hose valve is from the driveway.  Whatever those little things are they are bound to exist, and we might allow them to annoy us even if we don’t complain about them.

Since we already have a list of things each of us are saying “that is something I won’t miss” about this place, I have decided that I am going to start writing them down.  Why?  So that we will be reminded later that this place we left had a lot of things we didn’t like, and that despite any annoying things in our new place, the grass is still greener there.  It is literally greener, since it has a front and back yard, and it is greener because all the things that annoy us about where we are now, won’t exist anymore.  So even if new little annoyances come up, the grass on that side will always stay greener if we remember the long list of things we wouldn’t miss once we left here.

Yesterday my husband drove me 300 miles to Boise for 1 concert, then 300 miles home.  Yes you got it, 600 miles round trip for 1 concert without staying over night!  This was a 17 hour journey all together including 10 hours of driving, 1 hour eating dinner, and 6 hours at the venue.  He had to be back at work today so he slept in the car while I went to the concert.  Who is this I saw in concert.  Casting Crowns and Matt Redman.  Yes the Concert was excellent.  Even more so than that, the Lord was lifted up in worship by thousands of people in once place, always something amazing to be a part of!

One of the things that I was able to do while I was there was take part in meet and greet.  I was able to say hello to, and shake hands with, the members of Casting Crowns, regular people being obedient to what God has asked them to do.  Here is a question for you.  When was the last time you told someone “Thank you for saying Yes when the Lord said “do this for me” because now He is using you to minister to other people, even though you don’t always get to see the impact, God sees it.”  Have you ever told someone “thank you for saying Yes to God?”  I did that last night.  I told them thank you for saying “Yes” to God.  How many times do all of us tell God “Ummmm…I don’t think so!” or just “No”.  How many lives have been impacted because they said “Yes”?  I didn’t know what kind of reaction I would get.  They thanked me for encouraging them, they thanked me for telling them it mattered that they sacrifice to do what God has asked them to do.

1 Thessalonians 5:10-12 says “He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him.  Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.”   Something we are to be doing, encouraging one another.  So here is my challenge to you.  Think of someone you know that has impacted the lives around them because they said “Yes” to what God asked them to do.  It might be your pastor, a children’s worker, a bible study leader, an usher, the treasurer or someone you know is praying for your church.  It might be the person you least expect .  Ask God who you can encourage by thanking them for saying “Yes” when He asked them to be obedient.

This morning I called the movers and set up the official move to our new house!  On October 21st we will complete the process of buying our first home, and then on October 26th the movers will come pack, move, and unpack our things!  I sit here contemplating the fact that since June of 2006 this will be the 5th time I have moved.  I am beginning to understand how my husband felt as a child growing up as a missionary kid, though his moves didn’t usually involve floods.

The last two times we moved were earlier this year when we had our flood and we had to move out of apartment for several weeks.  Then at the end of the clean up process we simply moved back into it.  Those were move numbers 3 and 4, and I still have boxes left unpacked from move number 4.  This move is for a much more exciting reason!  Buying our first house is a dream come true.  I told my husband sometime during this process “thank you for making my dream come true” and he looked at me and he said “the second one” pointing toward our son.  I call them dreams because there were times in my life I didn’t think either of those two things would be possible, now I will have both.  When my son was born my first dream became real, and now my second is becoming real.

Though it means I have to move for the 5th time in just over 3 years, the feeling of having ones dream fulfilled is amazing.  This dream is a dream for someone else, which makes it even better.  You see, this dream is a dream that my son would have a backyard!  With a house comes a backyard-so dream fulfilled.  When we went to look at the house he cared more about the backyard than where his room might be, and that tells me he is getting something he has dreamed about too.  So to fulfill this dream, on October 26th we will undertake our 5th move since June 2006.

Standing in the pool yesterday at physical therapy I had to just stand, shoulder depth, feet apart, turning my head side to side, and discover the result.  Not so good!  I ended up losing my balance several times.  For those of you who have known me a few years, the pool is a place I spent a lot of time for several years.  So to not be able to do the simplest things in the pool now is quite a shock to me.  I stood there swaying back and forth trying to catch my balance, not doing a very good job of it.

Then the next interesting feeling came when I had to hold small paddles and swing my arms underwater, that was great!  Made me rock back and forth in the water losing my balance so many times I would have fallen over on land!  To know that my physical body has been through a difficult journey the past four years is one thing to deal with.  But when I realize what having a small part of my brain removed has done to my abilities it is a difficult thing to process sometimes.  I stood in that pool swaying back and forth, thinking to myself “I use to spend hours in the pool a day, now I can’t even stand up straight in it!  Wow I really am messed up!”

Today though I think about how I stood there looking back and forth, or swinging my arms back and forth, and it wasn’t the standing that was the problem, it was the distraction.  That got me thinking, how often do we sway because we are not standing, looking where we are going, but looking side to side?  Paul tells us in Hebrews to “fix our eyes on Jesus”. (Heb 12:1-2)  Why?  So that we won’t get caught up in the sin that so easily entangles us.  We need to not be looking side to side, but looking ahead, focused and fixed on the goal ahead of us.  It is when we start looking aside, getting distracted, that we start swaying.

When I was using the paddles in the pool I stepped backwards to correct my balance problem.  When we are looking side to side, and we sway, that is when we reach to grab something to stop us from swaying.  Those things off to the side, those distractions, those sins that entangle us, they are not the things the Lord desires for us.  Have you ever gotten so distracted you grab onto one of those things to keep you from swaying?  It happens.  Problem is those things are sometimes like those paddles I held onto, they make you step backward.  Backward is not a good place to go with God.  There is however a fix to this, and that is to remember that even if we turned our heads, stepped backwards, even a lot, all we have to do is turn forward again and there stands Christ.

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