My New Battle

August 1st 2009

For anyone who follows me on twitter, or on facebook, you know me as race_12_1.  If you ever spent anytime with me in a chat, you probably just ended up calling me race.  Though that isn’t my real name of course, I seem to answer by it quite well.  There is a story behind how I got that nick, and many of you have probably already read The Race is Worth Enduring.  Yesterday I was reading in 1 Corinthians and I read this:

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.” (1 Cor. 9:24-27)

Years ago I had chose my nick because of Hebrews 12:1-2 not realizing what was to lie ahead in my life, and now just as I thought my trial was somehow coming to a close, I read this.  I realize that the lessons from that trial are far from over.  I am still running the race, still in training, and still striving to get a crown that will last forever.  I can say that God has brought me through a very rocky road, but now I must now learn to live with the outcome of the trial He has brought me through.

Part of that is learning how to live with the physical consequences of the medical trial I went through.  I am not responsible for what happened to me.  I cannot control the side effects of my medications or the effects of having part of my brain removed.  What I can do however is make the decision that my testimony and my ministry are important enough not to simply resign myself to the fact that I am “left like this forever”.  Though it is a “physical thing” I cannot allow it to effect my testimony or ministry in a negative way, or I am allowing myself to be disqualified for the prize.  You see, I believe that God can do things we are not capable of.  He can help me learn to live without a part of my brain so that it doesn’t effect my testimony or ministry, and He can help me cope with the side effects of my medications.

This is a spiritual battle because what God is doing is far too important to allow the fact that I happen to get sick get in the way.