Last Monday was a big day, March 31st.  An anniversary that most people would never want to celebrate, and never would imagine calling an anniversary.  March 31st is the anniversary of my right temporal lobectomy.  The date on which I was given the chance to become seizure free, get some semblance of normalcy in my life.  The day we took a large step of faith at the last opportunity for me to be well again.

On March 31st 2008 I had a surgery that we knew was a percentage game, a percentage game we were willing to take because there were no other solutions left for what I was experiencing ever day of my life.  A 40% chance of being seizure free and  a 90% chance of a great reduction in seizures was better then doing nothing–which was  a zero% chance of ever being seizure free.  So I had a surgery I knew would change other things about my life because those could be dealt with, adjusted to, and were better then what I was living with at the time.

Now one year later I live a life that is different then before I got sick, but better then before I had my surgery.  So would I say I am “cured”? No–for there is no cure for epilepsy.  What I would say is that my life is better for the choice I made, because choosing to do nothing would have been a choice to give up, to decide to be defeated by an illness that was taking my life slowly.

Now I am learning to live the new life given to me by God through a set of circumstances He used to mold me into who I am today.  I am doing what He has asked me to do, using the experiences I went through for His glory.  I certainly wouldn’t choose to go through what I went through if I could have avoided it ahead of time, but now that I see how God molded me thorugh it I wouldn’t give it back.

So as that one year mark came and went it wasn’t about what I went through or what I had experienced.  I am amazed by how God has used it, what God is doing now with it, and I know God is going to keep using it in ways I don’t yet expect or imagine.


1 Comment

  1. You amaze me! How you keep such a good attitude and make the tough stuff count for God’s glory is something I aspire to. I’m doing a crappy job of it right now to be honest. I let the depression take over these past few days, and feel like I’m just beginning to surface again. Thanks for your encouraging words, and being who you are. It’s a huge blessing to me!

    Comment by Lisa (SunnySide) — April 7, 2009 @ 4:11 pm

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